Since it has been decided by various special interest groups that the globe is warming because of the human race, environmentalists have been thinking up creative ways to reduce the carbon footprint of our species on this planet. It has been said by a leading global warming theorist that in 30 or 40 years “most of the people will have died and the rest of us will be cannibals… Civilization will have broken down. The few people left will be living in a failed state — like Somalia or Sudan — and living conditions will be intolerable.” -Ted Turner
Today in some large city, an assembly of the most renowned climatologists gathered at a global
warming convention to try to change the direction of our species. The
convention lasting several days was resolved after long deliberation by discovering
the only reasonable way to stop global warming in its tracks, before our
civilization “breaks down”. It was decided that the only way to save the human
race from global warming is suicide.
They had been for several years taking less severe means of
saving the globe by having things like hybrid cars, vegan lifestyles, metal
water bottles, Al Gore DVD’s,and countless bumperstickers about hugging trees and such, but with only futile efforts. They decided that more severe path needed to be taken. They made a quick press release
to domestic as well as international communities about suicide being the definitive option to save the human race.
They made it a point to mention that it had been decided that they were not actually going to take part in this, stating “someone had to be around to collect the data”, but were urging Hummer owners to be the first to “kick their own bucket”. Rumors of that being discriminatory toward SUV owners were immediately
quieted by the group with this comment, “There is no such thing as discrimination against the guilty, and we all know, those people are largely at fault.”
Follow-up comments were made suggesting that if ridding the earth of Hummer owners, did not affect the global warming situation; it would “at the very least, lower the price of gas”.
I’ll be the first to say that I’m a pretty conservative dresser, and I’m not on the cutting edge of fashion. That’s because, well, I don’t want to be. If this is the cutting edge of fashion, you can count me out.
(Plus, I don’t wear dresses.)
We see all these two second clips of runway models all the time but what are they wearing?
Is that even reasonable?
If I saw some person dressed like that on the streets I would burst out into hysterical laughter. That maybe rude, but I don’t think I could help myself.
Is it all a joke? It looks a lot like Halloween to me, not a fashion show. Even so, there are still so many girls I know, who would just love to be one of these models, especially since America’s Next Top Model came out. I keep trying to tell girls that those models are only relatively pretty. I say relatively because they are very pretty compared to other awkward, long-legged creatures, like gazelles and giraffes, but are, when compared to females of the same species, in my opinion, just average looking skinny girls.
What is the purpose of runway modeling anyway? I think it was originally to advertise clothing. But can’t you reach a bigger audience with something like a … oh, I don’t know… commercial?
As if women aren’t objectified enough in this world, we need to actually have them strut up and down a stage with the sole purpose of being a “clothing holder”, an object much like a coat rack. If we keep up these objectifying principles, maybe I could hire a skinny girl as an ottoman.
The purpose now I think is just money. It all comes down to money and people who have it. It’s those people who have plenty of money to spend on absolutely nothing but either watching these girls strut, or buying these ridiculous clothes. This life is for the pure elitist, the one’s that consider themselves high-class and have a pseudo-need to dress in clothes that will keep them years ahead of the fashion trend.
For the sake of learning from our history, and showing how whimsical our predictions of the fashion trend can really be, I give you a video. It’s a prediction from the 20s about fashion in the year 2000. Let’s just say lady’s aren’t actually wearing electric lightbulbs on their head just yet.
