Ok, McDonalds, I know you’re trying to make a difference with the healthy additions to your menu. I also know that you’ve received lots of bad media for your borderline toxic food, but set aside the lawsuits and the documentaries and you’ve created yourselves a highly efficient, highly capitalistic restaurant that has left many people smiling and satisfied (you really do love to see us smile). You’ve created an empire of greasy food and burgers and that’s what people want. That is your role.

Your role is to be the place to eat that everyone knows they shouldn’t go but goes to anyway. If people want healthy food, which I can assure you they don’t, they would head down to subway and “Eat Fresh”. Americans don’t always want fresh, sometimes they just want fast, friendly food that makes them feel good, not feel good because I just ate salad and I’m proud to be healthy, but feel good because fatty food make my pores sweat grease and I don’t care.

Apathy, that’s what Americans are aiming for. Apathy. They don’t want to care about anything. If people wanted to care about being healthy, obesity would stop rising in the United States. We don’t see that in the near future of our country, do we?

You didn’t stop selling hot coffee when you got sued for burning someone (idiot), so don’t change your image now just because the media tells you to. Stay true to the American Dream McD’s: happy, wealthy, and plump.